A woman has been urged on Reddit to divorce her husband in a row over whether he should cancel a trip with the girls to take care of him after a routine dental procedure.
Amassing 16,000 upvotes, the 24-year-old, who goes by u/Good_Donut_816, explained that she planned a girl’s trip to Greece 18 months ago. But her absence happened to be when her husband had his wisdom teeth removed – something that could have been avoided as he could have chosen three dates for the surgery.
Newsweek discussed the post: “AITAH why did I go on a girls trip instead of taking care of my husband after surgery?” with two relationship experts.
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On September 4, the woman explained: “My husband informed me three weeks before I left for my trip that he was booked at that time and I would need to stay home and take care of him. I told him it wasn’t and that he should either pick a later date or get someone else to help him.
“We fought, but finally we decided [mother-in-law] Mill would come to take care of him and I would still go.’
When he returned home, his mom called her a “horrible” wife and accused her of neglecting him.
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“My husband is still angry and his whole family is giving me a hard time,” she wrote.
“There is nothing wrong here”
said relationship expert Kate Daly Newsweek: “The timing of his choice seems more like an attempt to sabotage the trip or make his partner feel guilty for taking time away from a real need for support during his recovery.”
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The co-founder of online divorce services company amicable, based in London, England, points out that the woman clearly communicated her plans and it was his choice to undergo the operation while she was away.
“He is not in the wrong here and it is important to recognize that his behavior, along with his family’s reactions, are attempts to guilt the woman into feeling responsible for a situation she created. I would tell her, you deserve to stand up for yourself without making yourself feel like a bad partner for doing that,” she added.
Dating expert Charlotte Ball couldn’t agree more. Bond co-founder The Agency says “there are clear signs of manipulation”.
she said Newsweek: “Although your partner may be the most important person in your life, it is vital to make time for your friends and family who love you. Being with your partner 24/7 24 hours a day you may feel isolated and indeed, a controlling partner will try to reduce you by withdrawing from your friends and family or limiting contact with them so that you do not receive the support you need. people.”
She encourages people to remember to make time for their friends and family while in a relationship.
“It’s perfectly healthy to be away from your partner as it will allow you to recharge and recharge as well as ensure you reconnect with who you are. Both partners need to have space to do what they love so much alone as well as with their friends without your partner present.
“With that in mind, unless it’s an emergency, there should be no reason for someone to unwittingly cancel plans and instead choose time to spend with their partner.”
Reddit Reacts
So far, the post has 10,000 comments and the top comment alone has 9,900 upvotes.
It read: “NTA. The reason he booked it when you’re about to leave makes no sense. He played a game you chose not to.”
Another said: “I had my wisdom teeth removed when I was 13. I don’t remember my mum needing to take a week off to pamper me. This grown man needed nothing more than a milkshake and a ride home.”
A third commenter wrote: “Yep. Get a divorce…f***. My wife is trying to cancel girls’ trips because she feels guilty about leaving the kids. But she needs a break. So I’m making her go… “
Newsweek could not verify the details as u/Good_Donut_816his account has been suspended.
Have you noticed any red flags that made you want to end a relationship? Let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can get expert advice and your story can be featured in Newsweek.